Raw is Baltimore – A recap for 9/13/16

Tonight’s Raw comes to us from the deep dark depths of hell cheery paradise of Baltimore, Maryland.

Cheap Pops/Cheap Heat

Raw started with Foley and Charlotte (with Dana) talking about the upcoming match at Clash of Champions with Sasha Banks for the rematch.  Of course Sasha and Bayley made their way out and they all argued who should really have the title shot.  Bayley (politely) reminded everyone that she pinned Charlotte clean last week and deserves a shot to be in the match.  Dana complains that she should be the one to help continue Charlotte’s reign.

The whole exercise felt like they were wasting time, way more so than the SmackDown Live Open Forum.  And that’s exactly what they were doing.  It’s a 3-hour show after all.  We end up with a Triple Threat to determine who should have the right to face Charlotte at Clash.

Maybe I’m being a little too harsh here.  I do think that Charlotte is one of the best, if not the best heel on the roster.  That “I’m better than you” moment from that Sasha match at Summerslam was probably one of the best, most intense single moments of the year.

On first viewing, I missed some of the subtle stuff they’re doing with Dana.  She’s eventually going to turn face on Charlotte and it’s not going to be pretty.

Anyway, Foley announces the following match:

Dana Brooke Vs. Sasha Banks Vs. Bayley

Despite my complaining about the opening segment.  I thought this match was pretty solid up until the ending.  Some great work from Dana Brooke in this match.  That’s something that I’m not used to saying.

But that ending.

Bayley gives Dana the Bayley-to-Belly and goes for the pin.  Sasha breaks the pin and rolls up Bayley.  Trouble is, Sasha’s shoulders were equally on the mat.  They intentionally did that finish with Dean and Seth just a couple of months ago.  Today it’s a win for Banks.

If it’s a mistake, which I’m sure it was, you should roll with it.  You now have a match, a good match, for next week.  But that’s not what happened.  They still have a chance to bring it up next week though.  Maybe they’ll go with that.

Rollins and the Angry Face of Foley

Rollins has a match with Owens at Clash.  We know that.  Roman has a chance to make it a triple threat tonight.  And Rollins wants to keep it a singles match, by any means necessary.

The mere hint of Rollins interfering sends Foley over the edge.  I think I’ve only seen Mankind this angry.

He continued to be angry in the following segments.  Part of me wonders if this is a response to how well the Miz/Daniel Bryan confrontation has been going.  I’ve got to believe it has something to do with it.

Roman Reigns Vs. Kevin Owens

I’ll start by saying that I liked this match.  The crowd was on fire for Reigns and Owens, something that can’t be said for almost any match on tonight’s card besides the triple threat at the beginning.

As you can probably guess, Rollins came out to attack Owens, giving Kevin a DQ win over Reigns.

Foley, about to explode, comes out to restart the match and ban Rollins from the arena.

We get kickouts galore.  Owens even kicks out of the Superman Punch!

Remember when Rusev said he was on a honeymoon for 23 days?  Looks like we all got swerved.  Rusev distracts Roman leading to a Pop-up Powerbomb and pin for the longest reigning Universal Champion. Looks like we’re having a singles match at Clash.  I’m assuming this also means that Roman and Rusev are going at it for the US Title.

Order has been restored.  Chrisley would be proud.

 

And The Rest

  • Cesaro is almost even at 3-2 but did so by using the ropes as leverage to pin Sheamus.  Last time I checked, that’s a heel move.  WTF?  In fact, Sheamus weighed in:

  • Primo and Epico try to swindle R-Truth into buying a timeshare at the Shining Stars resort in Puerto Rico.  $5 says it’s a shack.  Golddust scares them away.  I hope they at least fought on Superstars to justify all that face paint.
  • The New Day realize that The Old Day segment was terrible and promised they destroyed any existence of the footage.
  • The New Day and Gallows and Anderson had a SummerSlam rematch with no title on the line.  Because it didn’t matter, the New Day lost with a Magic Killer to Xavier.
  • Alicia Foxx gets murdered by Nia Jaxx.  The match ends in DQ or count out.  I’m not sure.  Either way, Foxxy was out after being driven through the baricade.
  • Enzo and Cass continue their feud with the shining stars, losing yet again to some heel tactics.  Prepare for a blow off match at Clash of Champions that no one is going to care about, except for the fact that Enzo and Cass are in it.  I will be mildly amused if they send Enzo to Puerto Rico to reveal the whole time share scam.
  • Jinder Mahal speaks!  Then he destroys Jack Swagger.  A backstage interviewer mentions that Swagger’s contract is up soon.  He says nothing.  I don’t understand how he’s still on the roster.
  • No Strowman squash this week.  Instead, we get to Bo-lieve as Dallas dispatches the local talent.  I’m not really sure what they’re doing here but I’m amused by Michele being horrified by Dallas’ singlet.
  • Highlight Reel with Sami Zayn as the guest:  Excellent work from the current and former best friends of the longest reigning Universal Champion.  After Sami calls Jericho Kevin’s bitch, Zayn gets hit in the head by a cell phone.  A match is set for Clash of Champions.
  • Michele is worried that Mick Foley is going to have a heart attack.  Someone needs to do more DDP Yoga.